Is Heather getting married?

I love Q & A sessions on retreats because teens tend to ask the most random questions. Recently, an 8th grader asked if I was getting married. That day I had to respond, “I hope so.” But, today, as an officially engaged woman, I could answer that question by saying, “Why, yes I am!  Thanks for asking.”

On the Feast of Our Lady of Guadalupe, my boyfriend of one year, Michael Vento, asked me to be his bride.

The Day Really Matters
One year ago, on Dec. 12, 2005, I was visiting the Sisters of Life in New York City. Although I never felt much called to religious life, I certainly thought it was beautiful and wanted to give it a chance. I stayed with the amazing Sisters of Life for four days – long enough to begin to get a taste of their community.  And, I honestly adore each of them and their beautiful lifestyle. Over the long weekend, we celebrated the miracle of Our Lady of Guadalupe and I fell in love with this historic event.

On my last day with the Sisters of Life, I had a great deal of quiet prayer time, which I needed, anticipating that God’s call would be difficult to hear. Since it was the Feast of Our Lady of Guadalupe, I asked her to intercede for me – to pray that God would speak clearly to me. And, He did! He answered me through prayer, Scripture, and a book called And You are Christ’s (amazing for vocational discernment!). I journaled and had spiritual direction with the vocation director of the community. Every part of the day confirmed what he was saying to me in quiet prayer. He not only made it clear to me that I wasn’t called to religious life, but He also made it clear to me that I was called to the vocation of marriage. Deep in my heart and soul, I knew it was His voice and His peace calling me, after years of discernment, His nudges toward marriage and waiting.

Four days later, Michael and I went out for the first time. How about God’s timing?

The Proposal
So, on December 12, 2006, Michael and I went to evening Mass to celebrate the Feast of Our Lady of Guadalupe. Then, he took me to Lo Russo’s Italian Restaurant in St. Louis Hills (being Italian – Sicilian actually – he knows where to find the best pasta). Lastly, we went to the small Adoration chapel at St. Justin the Martyr. There was no one inside except Jesus in the tabernacle. Then I saw a huge picture of Our Lady of Guadalupe with a dozen red roses underneath. The roses appropriately should be under Our Lady, as that was her gift to Juan Diego and the Bishop. However, these roses were Michael’s gift to me. And, there in the presence of Jesus, he proposed…and, I said yes! We hope to be married on Saturday, September 1, 2007.

Worth the Wait
As a 30-year-old living chastity, I want to remind you that it’s all worth the wait. I often ask teens, “Who wants to be an incredible lover?” Then, I inform them that chastity is the virtue that transforms our sexual desires into pure love, nothing less than a total gift – making you a great lover and gift to friends, family and everyone you know. My fiancé is an example of an incredible lover. In living chastity for years, Michael really knows how to love, sacrifice and give abundantly. I feel like the most blessed woman in the world to be able to marry this amazing man of God – overflowing with God’s love. I pray that through our relationship with Jesus we may continue to grow in love, sacrifice and service to each other and our children for the rest of our lives.

More than Meets the Eye
In the story of Our Lady of Guadalupe, we discover so much more than roses and a picture, when we look deeper. With my relationship with Michael, I feel there’s so much more to discover as we gaze deeper upon Christ and upon each other especially with His eyes. Michael is less chatty than me. He prefers hockey and soccer, whereas I adore football and basketball. Michael likes a quiet night at home while I want to go out to a party. I never imagined that I’d fall in love with someone different than me. But, I must admit that I love it! He slows me down, helps me focus on what’s important, shows me how to listen and teaches about power plays and penalty kicks.

We complement each other while also sharing a lot in common… the same foundation – our crazy love of Jesus and the Church, Lord of the Rings, the card game nertz and much more. It's a sweet blend of enjoying so much of the same already, but also needing and seeking the other to grow and be challenged. We experience this complementarity in addition to the fun, natural ways we find ourselves blending as a man and woman. Blessed Teresa of Calcutta best described what Michael and I are just starting to enjoy, "A woman's love is one image of the love of God, and a man's love is another image of God's love. Both are created to love, but each in a different way. Woman and man complete each other, and together show forth God's love more fully than either can do it alone."

If you’re like I used to be, waiting for your vocation, just keep trusting in Jesus. I have no great words of wisdom right now. I just have my story to offer, which, I pray, will serve as a sign of hope for anyone who questions God’s amazing love and plan. My dear friend Jen recently joined the Nashville Dominicans and she is also beaming and glowing to be in God’s plan, where He wants to fulfill her and ultimately lead her to Heaven. No matter where or when you’re called vocationally, God has prepared something amazing for you both now and in the future. So, keep the faith - there's more to God’s plan for your life than meets the eye, always more than you can even imagine!