Wild and Captivating

Rarely do I find a movie or book so powerful that I want to spread the word, yet this happens to be one of those times.

Wild at Heart by John Eldredge and Captivating by John and Stasi Eldredge (co-authored with the Mrs.) are revolutionary books in the Christian world. Wild at Heart is a best-seller and Captivating, very recently published, is making noise and promising to be as influential as Wild at Heart. If read with an open heart, these books will change the way you view yourself, the opposite sex and your relationship with God. In fact, for me, I feel stronger as a woman and have even adapted my expectations and hopes of the future because of how God’s truth is portrayed in these books.

About one year ago, when I read Wild at Heart… Discovering the Secret of a Man’s Soul, I was immediately challenged in how I view and treat guys. I grew a deep appreciation for the male soul and how God created men to be. For Christian men who have embraced the message of this book, I know they’ve experienced amazing transformation as well. An accountability and prayer group of young, professional men decided to base a retreat and their accountability questions on the challenges put forth in the book (I can email them to you if you want to see them). Although I know these men appreciate this book beyond words, I’m also impressed when I hear their wives describe how their marriages have changed since their husbands became wild men. I ran into some high school guys just last week who decided to write and lead a retreat for the men in their youth group solely based on Wild at Heart. The book continues to inspire people!

One of the cutest things I heard regarding Wild at Heart came from a good friend who was talking to her boyfriend about the book. They decided to read it at the same time and discuss it. Her boyfriend forgot a bit of the chapters by the time they had a chance to discuss the book. They talked through it regardless, but when they got to the chapter called, “Rescuing the Beauty”, and it was evident he didn’t remember the content too well, my friend sweetly asked, “Could you read it again? Maybe twice?” It’s not that she felt he wasn’t “rescuing” her, but it’s that the chapter so eloquently described what the female heart longs for deep down. I don’t know any woman who has read the book who wouldn’t want her husband or boyfriend – in fact all of the men in her life - to read that chapter twice.

Captivating…Unveiling the Mystery of a Woman’s Soul is the female version of Wild at Heart. I must admit that I’m only on Chapter 3 and am already blown away by the content of this book. I couldn’t wait to finish it before I recommended it to you. I suggested it to a teen friend of mine just a couple of days ago and she already wrote me, “I must say it is giving me some great perspective on things. I really like so many parts. I especially liked the part where they explain the curse from Genesis and how those curses work to control many relationships. I’m just a little into it, but I wanted to let you know that I thoroughly enjoy it.” And, just as Wild at Heart was a great read for me, and I think all women should read it, I hope that all of you men will take some time to read Captivating, so that you will better love and understand the women in your lives.

I hope that none of you will be worried about the idea of women being “rescued” or a book calling Christian women to “captivate,” believing it’s another method of Christian gender stereotyping or encouraging male domination. If you feel such a way, I just encourage you to read the book with an open mind and heart – there’s so much more depth to the books than the titles might infer. A female friend of mine, who would never pick up a Christian book, much less one of these, was at first offended by the idea of being “rescued”. But, after I explained the content of the chapter to her a bit, she admitted that her current boyfriend, unlike her previous boyfriend, is so strongly a man that she feels more like a woman than ever in her life. She loves it. This is what these books encourage – being more fully the man or woman God created you to be.

Therefore, men, since so many women have been blessed by the men in their lives who have been transformed through the message of Wild at Heart, if you haven’t read it yet, it’s time for you to become a real wild man (or even wilder). And, similarly, I believe that men will be blessed, as more and more of us women become transformed by the life-changing wisdom of Captivating. So, women, don’t drag your feet – the men in our lives deserve to be truly captivated.

If you’ve read the books, I’d love to hear your perspective. Send an email to heather@reapteam.org. Paul Masek and I are giving a workshop at Steubenville Mid-America next month and our talk will include some of these concepts, and much more! Feedback on these two books might even be helpful for us as to continue to prepare the talk. And, if you’re going to Steubenville in Springfield, we hope to see you there!