Does Porn Tempt You?

As this New Year begins, I want to address an issue that is very prevalent in our society, affects countless people, and yet is something that very few people talk about…pornography.

By the way, thanks for being brave enough to read this blog. If pornography does not tempt you, then I encourage you to thank God for that, and feel free to stop reading. Or, read on in the hopes of learning something that could help a family member or a friend who struggles with porn. But, perhaps you decided to read this because the answer to my question is ‘yes’; you are one of the many people tempted by porn.

The temptation to view porn is everywhere. On the Internet, pop up ads can appear unannounced. Seemingly safe websites can have ads and links imbedded in them that are very seductive. Spam emails provide links that, if clicked, can take you to forbidden places. Search engines can be asked to take you to content that your mother would blush to see. If you have cable TV, you can stumble upon explicit materials while innocently channel surfing. The devil uses many avenues to tempt us to view porn; there are other ways, but I don’t want to give you any more ideas…

If you are tempted to view porn, it is important to know that you are not alone. It is a huge temptation for many people; it’s just, as I said earlier, an issue that very few people ever talk about it. It is a critical distinction to remember that to be tempted to sin is normal, and happens to everyone. Again, I want to be very clear about this - it is not a sin to experience temptation - it is only a sin when we give in to temptation and choose sinful behavior. Scripture even tells us that Jesus was tempted in every way that we are, but never sinned. Now, He obviously did not have the Internet or cable programming, but if I am reading the Bible correctly, Jesus was tempted to lust. And, the problem with pornography is that it causes us to lust.

Here is what the Catechism of the Catholic Church says about lust –

Lust is disordered desire for or inordinate enjoyment of sexual pleasure. Sexual pleasure is morally disordered when sought for itself, isolated from its procreative and unitive purposes.

In other words, any time we view porn, it always makes us think of people as objects, and that is disordered thinking. And, pornography always distorts the true meaning of the sexual act, which is supposed to be about love and life – not selfish pleasure. The problems can easily escalate, too. I read an article not too long ago that quotes some experts who believe that pornography may actually be more addictive than crack cocaine! You can read that article here - Article on Pornography Addiction.

Not too many people I know would experiment with such a drug as dangerous as crack cocaine, and yet how many people flirt with viewing pornography, thinking that it really doesn’t hurt anybody? I actually know a couple of people who are addicted to porn. They have told me their stories, and I assure you that you do not want to become those guys. The problems they face in relationships, and in their thought life, are horrible. The addiction is real, and if you have ever known anyone addicted to anything, you certainly don’t want to go there.

So, the big question is – how do we deal with the temptation of porn? I have a couple of very practical suggestions for you.

1) Block it out. Anyone with basic computer knowledge can help you set up controls to block out quite a bit of the offensive material that is out there. Cable providers allow you to block out certain types of programs and certain channels. If you don’t know how to do this, ask for help. People who love you will want to help protect you.

2) Don’t go there. Some friends of mine have decided to impose a “zero tolerance” policy when it comes to viewing suggestive material. Rather than flirting with disaster, they have decided to make a formal commitment to God and to one another to avoid disaster altogether. It is a decision I think we all should make.

3) Be accountable. This is, in my opinion, the best defense. Find a friend who can ask you the hard questions at any time, out of love for you. I am in a men’s prayer group where we are accountable to one another, and it is awesome. There is also free accountability software out there, which I would recommend, whether this is a major problem for you or not. Just having the software installed will strengthen your resolve to avoid porn on the Internet. To learn more about this free software, go to Free Accountability Software.

4) Pray. The Lord’s Prayer has this great line, “Lead us not in temptation, but deliver us from evil”. Ask the Lord to increase your strength to be pure, through the power of the Holy Spirit. Pray, frequently, “Jesus save me.” He loves saving us from temptation and sin! Try slowly saying a “Hail Mary”, which can do wonders as we pursue purity. Finally, in the midst of temptation, ask God to transform your thoughts of lust into what you ultimately most desire – real love, affection and intimacy.

In conclusion, please remember this. God loves us and wants the best for us. That is why He wants us to live lives of sexual purity, and to avoid the traps of pornography.